i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
