He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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