They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize
