Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
