Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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