Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
my poor anus
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
