Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
