Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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