Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
