they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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