SEEEEXXX PLEASE
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize