He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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