dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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