my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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