I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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