He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
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