True but thats because hes a fetus.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize