it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
