I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
