You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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