she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
