we're chasing vodka with high fives
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
