I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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