you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
