before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
