For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
