I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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