He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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