Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize