i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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