In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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