how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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