im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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