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Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
