If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
