just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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