Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
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