I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize