found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
