I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
But break dance skills will only take you so far
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
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