I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
