someone threw a dead crab at me
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
