yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
It's Friday. Sex?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
