I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
