don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
