FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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