Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize