tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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