You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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