Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I think a kid would responsible me up
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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