He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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