i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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